About six years ago something wonderful, miraculous, dangerous, and difficult happened. My son was about five months old and I realized my life needed to change if I was going to be a good mother.
It was wonderful because my Christian mentor, and my dear family member, recognized how lost I was and offered me a way out. It was miraculous because it took my first child to see that I could be better, and he saved my life. Truly. It was difficult because my path was so steep, my road so long, I knew it would take the rest of my life to traverse them. And it was dangerous because I was surrounded by sin and sinful people like myself and I was the one who wanted to be better.
If you don’t think that’s dangerous, try it. They think you are crossing them. They think you have elevated yourself above them, erroneously. They don’t like it, and they have ways of letting you know it. They mock you, they scorn you, they leave you out – and they may even hurt you. Yes, dangerous.
A few weeks ago I realized, yet again, that my path seems so steep. How incredibly frustrating it is to realize all the work that has to be done to sanctify oneself! For years I have deeply resented people who don’t know how that feels. At first I thought they didn’t know because they didn’t have so far to go, and such a precipitous thoroughfare to climb. And I am glad to say that there are still lots of people in my life whom I feel don’t have that steep road to travel, and I do not resent them. I may be totally wrong, but I don’t resent them. I am proud to know them, and I pay attention to what they say and do to learn from them what the peace of godly life is like.
No, I think there are billions of people out there who have just as arduous a passage to travel as I do, but I do not think they are as focused on it as I. The path is steep for everyone – everyone who tries, that is. And I do believe there are more people out there trying than I once thought.
To you I say, do not give up! As Joyce Meyer says, press on! Press through! I know the end feels like it’s not in sight, but it is! And not just in eternity, but in the here and now. Every day you have a chance to change your attitude. Every day. No matter how frustrated you are with yourself, leave it at Jesus’ feet at the end of your quiet time and resolve to do your best. That is all you can do. And eventually you will start to gain some peace from that.
Good luck in your endeavors. You have joined the ranks of those who do not rest on whatever laurels they may have! You have decided to take up your faults as God wants you to do and change them to the very best of your ability.